Ways to Avoid envy and Jealousy

In my last post, I wrote about the evil of jealousy. In this blog I would like to give some of the solutions that help removing that envy and jeolousy from the heart.

Shaykh Salih Al-Munajjid mentioned different ways  to be followed to get rid of envy and jealousy :
* Making Du’aa to Allah and asking Him to remove any problem person is facing toward others. The Prophet (Pbuh) used to say “guide my heart and remove ill will from my breast).” The phrase “guide my heart” means to the straight path, and “remove ill will from my breast” means take away all insincerity, rancor and hatred.

* Pondering the meanings of the Quran and reading it frequently, especially the verses which speak of hasad (destructive jealousy), because reading the Quran brings one a great deal of reward for good deeds. Allah says: “Verily, the good deeds remove the evil deeds” (Hood: 114)

* Reading the biography of the prophet (Pbuh), seeing how he kept away from hasad and how he loved well for others, even for his enemies.

*Reading the biographies and stories of the Sahaabah that teach the love and how they helped each other without being jealous

 *Seeking refuge with Allah from the accursed Shaytaan, and keep self busy with something that will make forget the whispers and bad thoughts.

 *If the Shaytaan manages to instill hasad in the heart, then beware lest you say or do anything which will show that hasad. Every person has his or her share of hasad. Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah said: “Nobody is free from hasad, but the noble person hides it whilst the base person shows it.” (Amraad al-Quloob). A person will not be brought to account for whatever crosses his mind, but he will be brought to account for what he says and does. The Prophet (Pbuh) said: “Allaah will forgive my ummah for their mistakes, what they forget and what they are forced to do.”

*If you feel that you are jealous of a specific person, then buy him a gift and shake hands with him. The Prophet (Pbuh) said: “Shake hands, for this will dispel rancor, and exchange gifts and love one another, for this will dispel hatred.”

Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah said in his book Amraad al-Quloob (diseases of the heart): 

“Whoever find in himself any hasad towards another has to try to neutralize it by means of taqwa (piety, consciousness of Allah) and patience. So he should hate that (the feeling of hasad) in himself… But the one who does wrong to his brother by word or deed will be punished for that. The one who fears Allah and is patient, however, is not included among the wrongdoers, and Allaah will benefit him by his taqwa.”

It is great lesson learned from the story of  Yusuf and his brothers about the danger of jealousy and what can lead to. So, for Muslim “male or female” should avoid hasad (jealousy) toward others and follow the solutions given to overcome it.

Evil of Envy and Jealousy

Jealousy (or destructive envy) means "wishing that a blessing that Allah has bestowed on the envied person be taken away."

 Shaykh Ibn Uthaymeen (may Allah have mercy on him) said, “Anybody who is jealous is accusing Allah of unjustice and ignorance.”  Because the jealous man is thinking, “He doesn’t deserve this, but I deserve it. I am more worthy to have it than him. Anybody who is jealous has a problem in his belief and faith, and that is why jealousy destroys good deeds as the prophet (Pbuh) said: “Beware of jealousy, for verily it destroys good deeds the way fire destroys wood." (Abu Dawood, book 18, Had. 1569). Hasad or destructive jealousy causes a great deal of harm in this world and in the Hereafter. Al-Tirmidhi narrated from al-Zubayr ibn al-‘Awaam that the Prophet (Pbuh) said: “There has come to you the disease of the nations before you, jealousy and hatred. This is the ‘shaver’ (destroyer); I do not say that it shaves hair, but that it shaves (destroys) faith. By the One in Whose Hand is my soul, you will not enter Paradise until you believe, and you will not believe until you love one another. Shall I not tell you of that which will strengthen love between you? Spread (the greeting of) salaam amongst yourselves.” (Al-Tirmidhi, Vol.4, Book,37, Had.2699). Concerning the meaning of the phrase “it shaves (destroys) faith”, it was said that it means: hatred takes away faith like a razor takes away hair.” 

In the story of Yusuf (Alayhi salam), his brothers got jealous because of extra love that their father had for Yusuf and his younger brother which lead them to make great sin by killing him. It is same as the son of Adam who killed his brother because of jealousy. The jealousy can lead person to make serious crimes. Sometimes jealousy can be good but only for two things as the prophet (Pbuh) clarifies in hadith “There is no envy except in two cases: a person whom Allah has given wealth and he spends it in the right way, and a person whom Allah has given wisdom (i.e. religious knowledge) and he gives his decisions accordingly and teaches it to the others." (Al-Bukhari, Vol.2, book24, Had.490).



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Patience and its Virtues from Quran and Hadeeth

Patient is defined as: “the quality of being patient, as the bearing of provocation, annoyance, misfortune, or pain, without complaint, loss of temper, irritation, or the like” (Dictionnary).

Patience is characterized by remaining spiritually firm, and to keep doing good action when facing opposition or encountering problems, and unwanted results. The best level of patient is “Sabrun Jameel” (the beautiful patient) that prophet Ya’qub showed when he lost his both children Yusuf and his young brother Benyamin. Sabrun jameel means "you don’t want the sympathy of the others but just wait for Allah’s help." There are other types of patience and that is patient at the time of calamities which need patient to bear the bitterness of troubles and misfortunes. The second type is patient in obedience of Allah and that to have patient to worship Allah during difficult time. And last is to have patient against prohibited acts by refraining from doing or even approaching sins that are attractive.

The reward of patience does not have account like other deeds that are rewarded 10 to 700, it is only Allah who rewards those who are patient, Allah says: “Indeed, the patient will be given their reward without account." (Az-zumar:10).

Many verses in Quran talked about the virtue of patience and the reward for those who show patient and Allah says that He will be with those are patient. Allah mentioned in Quran that when the believer is patient and pious, the plot of the enemy cannot do any harm, even if he is powerful, Allah says:“But if you remain patient and become Al-Muttaqoon (the pious), not the least harm will their cunning do to you. Surely, Allah surrounds all that they do”(Al-Imran :120). 

Allah has given glad tidings to those who are patient, “and give glad tidings to As‑ Saabiroon (the patient).  Who, when afflicted with calamity, say: ‘Truly, to Allaah we belong and truly, to Him we shall return. They are those on whom are the Salawaat (i.e. who are blessed and will be forgiven) from their Lord, and (they are those who) receive His Mercy, and it is they who are the guided ones”(Al-Baqarah :155-157). 

Allah forgives and rewards those who do righteous deeds and are patient, Allah says:  “Except those who show patience and do righteous good deeds: those, theirs will be forgiveness and a great reward (Paradise)” (Hood :11).

In the hereafter, those who were patient Allah will reward them with houses in paradise and it will be said to them “Peace be upon you for what you patiently endured. And excellent is the final home.” (Al-Raad:23). 

The prophet (Pbuh) said “Whoever would be patient, then Allah will make him patient. There is no gift that is better and more comprehensive than patience” (Al-Bukhari, Vol.2, book 24, Had.548). In fact, true patience is to be calm and composed the first strike of a calamity. Anas ibn Malik reported:  “The Messenger of Allah (Pbuh) passed by a woman who was weeping beside a grave. The Prophet said: Be mindful of Allah and be patient. She said, “Go away from me, for you have not been afflicted by a calamity like mine!” And she did not recognize him. Then, she was told that it was the Prophet, so she went to the house of the Prophet and she did not find any bodyguards there. She said to him, “I did not recognize you.” The Prophet said:She said to him, “I did not recognize you.” The Prophet said: Verily, patience is at the first strike of calamity (Al- Bukhari, Vol.2,book23, Had.372).

 Umm Salamah (may Allah be pleased with her) said: I heard the Messenger of Allah (Pbuh) say: “When a person suffers from a calamity and utters: We belong to Allah and to Him we shall return. O Allah! Compensate me in my affliction, recompense my loss and give me something better in exchange for it, then Allah surely compensates him with reward and better substitute." (Muslim, book7, Had.921). He (Peace be upon him) said “How wonderful is the case of a believer; there is good for him in everything and this applies only to a believer. If prosperity attends him, he expresses gratitude to Allah and that is good for him; and if adversity befalls him, he endures it patiently and that is better for him.” (Muslim, Book1, Had.27).

SUCCESSFUL BELIEVER

Everyone wants to be successful. But what is true success? When we look at the Quran we find that there is a chapter that was revealed in honor of the believers. The chapter is Surah “Al-Mu’minun (23:1-11). Allah Almighty begins the chapter by Saying “Successful indeed are the believers” which  means, they have attained victory and are blessed, for they have succeeded.

Then Allah Almighty describes successful believers as:

Those who with their Salah are Khashi`un which means those with fear and with tranquillity. Khushu` in prayer is only attained by the one who has emptied his heart totally, who does not pay attention to anything else besides it, and who prefers it above all else. At that point Salat becomes a delight and a joy for eyes, as in the Hadith recorded by Imam Ahmad and An-Nasa'i from Anas, who said that the Messenger of Allah said:

«حُبِّبَ إِلَيَّ الطِّيبُ وَالنِّسَاءُ، وَجُعِلَتْ قُرَّةُ عَيْنِي فِي الصَّلَاة»

“Fragrance and women have been made dear to me, and Salah was made the joy of my eye”.

 And those who turn away from Al-Laghw which refers to falsehood, which includes Shirk and sin, and any words or deeds that, are of no benefit.

And those who pay the Zakah.

And those who guard their private parts. Except from their wives and their right hand possessions, for then, they are free from blame. But whoever seeks beyond that, then those are the transgressors which means, those who protect their private parts from unlawful actions and do not do that which Allah has forbidden; fornication and homosexuality, and do not approach anyone except the wives whom Allah has made permissible for them or their right hand possessions from the captives. One who seeks what Allah has made permissible for him is not to be blamed and there is no sin on him

 Those who are faithfully true to their Amanat (trusts) and to their covenants. When they are entrusted with something, they do not betray that trust, but they fulfill it, and when they make a promise or make a pledge, they are true to their word. This is not like the hypocrites about whom the Messenger of Allah said:

«آيَةُ الْمُنَافِقِ ثَلَاثٌ: إِذَا حَدَّثَ كَذَبَ، وَإِذَا وَعَدَ أَخْلَفَ، وَإِذَا اؤْتُمِنَ خَان»

“The signs of the hypocrite are three: when he speaks he lies, when he makes a promise he breaks it, and when he is entrusted with something he betrays that trust”.

And those who strictly guard their Salawat which means, they persistently offer their prayers at their appointed times, as Ibn Mas`ud said: "I asked the Messenger of Allah , `O Messenger of Allah, which deed is most beloved to Allah' He said,

«الصَّلَاةُ عَلَى وَقْتِهَا»

“Prayer at the appointed time”.  I said, `Then what' He said,

«بِرُّ الْوَالِدَيْن»

“Kindness to one's parents”. Qatadah said: "At the fixed times, with the proper bowing and prostration.'' Allah begins and ends this list of praiseworthy qualities with Salah, which is indicative of its virtue, as the Prophet (Peace be upon him) said:

«اسْتَقِيمُوا وَلَنْ تُحْصُوا، وَاعْلَمُوا أَنَّ خَيْرَ أَعْمَالِكُمُ الصَّلَاةُ، وَلَا يُحَافِظُ عَلَى الْوُضُوءِ إِلَّا مُؤْمِن»

“Adhere to righteousness, you will never be able encompass it all. Know that the best of your deeds is Salah. None will preserve his Wuddu' except the believer”

When Allah Almighty described the believers with the praiseworthy characteristics and righteous deeds. Allah Almighty said:

These are indeed the heirs. Who shall inherit Firdaws. They shall dwell therein forever. It was recorded in the Two Sahihs that the Messenger of Allah said: “If you ask Allah for Paradise, then ask him for Al-Firdaws, for it is the highest part of Paradise, in the middle of Paradise, and from it spring the rivers of Paradise, and above it is the (Mighty) Throne of the Most Merciful”.

Muharram: The Sacred Month

Muharram is the first month of the Hijri calendar and is one of the four sacred months.  Allah Almighty said: “Indeed, the number of months with Allah is twelve [lunar] months in the register of Allah [from] the day He created the heavens and the earth; of these, four are sacred. That is the correct religion, so do not wrong yourselves during them.” [ 9:36]. Ibn Abbaas ( RA) said that this phrase (so do not wrong yourselves during them… ) referred to all the months, then these four were singled out and made sacred, so that sin in these months is more serious and good deeds bring a greater reward.

The prophet (Peace be upon him) encourages increasing one's fasting during the month of Muharram.

 It is reported that He (Peace be upon him) said: “The best of fasting after Ramadan is fasting Allah's month of Muharram." [Muslim].

The tenth day of Muharram, known as 'Aashooraa', has a special significance. Ibn Abbaas (RA) said: "The Prophet (Peace be upon him) came to Madeenah and saw the Jews fasting on the day of 'Aashooraa'. He said `What is this? They said, `This is a righteous day, it is the day when Allah saved the Children of Israel from their enemies, so Moosa fasted on this day.' He said: `We have more right to Moosa than you,' so he fasted on that day and commanded (the Muslims) to fast on that day." [Al-Bukhari]

Fasting the day of Aashooraa’ has great reward because the prophet (Peace be upon him) said: “For fasting the day of 'Aashoora'a, I hope that Allah will accept it as expiation for the past year.” [Muslim]